Let's Talk About Boundaries

I don’t know about you but it has taken me a LONG time to really understand boundaries.  I certainly wasn’t taught healthy boundaries as a child.  I was in the 90s group of Codependents.  I remember reading books about boundaries and trying to understand all of the guidelines.  So….if I was in this situation then respond this way, in that situation act this other way.  It was really quite complex and heady to me.  Especially since I’m an empath.

I have always been able to feel what is going on in situations.  I feel what people are feeling. If someone is upset, I sense it right away. If someone is anxious, I feel that emotion.  It took me years to sort this out!  It took me years to determine which thoughts and emotions were mine and which ones belonged to other people.  For years I was flying blind.

My daughter has taught me a great deal about boundaries!  She has definitely taught me the importance of establishing good boundaries.  Kids will push every boundary you have and if you aren’t clear on where your boundaries are, you better get clear real fast or you will have a mess on your hands. 

This is how I came up with the material for my Transform class.  I literally got pushed past my limits!  Between being a single mom with a storefront, a 2 year old child (at the time), a sick father that died, chronic gut problems - I was tapped out.  I had pushed myself past my energetic limits, big time.  Before this point in my life, I thought I had endless energy.  Then before I knew it, I had myself in the biggest tangle of my whole life.  I had created more than I could handle.  I was tapped out. 

Boundaries saved my life!  Quite literally.  I had to start setting some boundaries and fast.  My life depended on it. 

I started viewing my energy level like my bank account.  I knew that I had to seal any leaks, meaning that I had to see where I was spending my energy unnecessarily.  Were there certain tasks I could eliminate or get someone else to do?  Did I really need to setup at a booth all of those events, just because I was invited. Was I saying yes where I needed to say no? You get the idea.  This process allowed me to get more energy back in my pocket.

Then I began finding ways to ground my energy.  I realized my energy had been scattered.  I was too outwardly focused.  I started finding ways to pull my energy back into MY life, MY family and MY body.

Now that I was present, I saw that I needed to strengthen my boundaries.  It was time to get clear about what was important in my life and to commit myself to those things through the choices I made on a daily basis.  I created a boundary around what I wanted to grow in my life and said no to the rest.

At this point, I was no longer in crisis mode.  I had recouped lots of energy and my levels were balancing out.  Now it was time to focus on things that would bring me more energy again!  I had the clarity, strength and focus to spend more time doing what fed me, what gave me joy and more energy.

Now, I no longer take my energy for granted.  I realize that I have to make decisions every day to stay in alignment with what I want to nurture and create more of in my life. And that doesn't always make me popular.  I have to say no more.  I have to linger less.  I have to trust and believe in my own guidance and path even when others don't understand.

I love teaching others how to recoup their energy, create healthy boundaries, streamline their focus and start tapping into their heart space so they can start creating their life on their own terms!   If you are ready to get your life back, PM me.  I would love to work with you.  Also, check out my online Transform class.  http://www.createwellness.me/transform.html.  <3